I Love A Sex Addict

Sometimes it just helps to vent July 17, 2010

I haven’t posted in a couple months now, wow!  I have been so busy with work and recovery.  I have really been using my summer off to get somethings straight and figure out who I am and who I want to be.  But this summer hasn’t been with out its challenges.

I really just need to vent.

My husbands family is out of control.  They are pushing and prodding at him and he just constantly lets it get to him.  He needs to brush it off and move on with his live, but he lets their little emotional and hurtful digs and comments bring him down.  I know it’s not easy, and I love how hard he tries.  We pray for them every night.  They all need it in their own ways.  But sometimes it just gets to be more than he can handle.  God bless him.  He hasn’t let this latest round of drama affect his recovery.  He’s staid tried and true to the path he laid out.  It has affected his mood, his behavior, and other aspects of his life, but not his recovery this time.  This is a huge step for him and for us.  Its a step towards rebuilding the trust that was shattered.  I’m grateful for that opportunity, but wish it came under better circumstances.  His aunt wished me dead by drunk driver earlier today.  I don’t know what I am even supposed to say to that?  I have talked on here before about how I feel.  Drunk driving is the stupidest crime.  I cannot and will not tolerate it.  As an addiction’s counseling student I know how serious a disease alcoholism can be.  But drunk driving is beyond stupid.  For someone to wish me death by the one thing I hate more than anything is just a low blow.

Then there is my friends.  I love my good friend E to death.  She has been having a hard time with her husband lately.  We’ve talked about it a lot, and I can really relate to what she is struggling with.  What kills me, is I am really starting to get annoyed with her husband.  I have done some volunteer work for a company he is trying to start in the past, and I am happy to do it at any time, he knows this.  But a month or so back he send me an email to come to a staff meeting for an important event and that everyone had to be there.  Well he had never ASKED about this event, and when I informed him I wouldn’t be available because I had something previously scheduled that day he got annoyed with me.  Things have been really kind of chilly between us since then.  A few months before that my husband and I were considering buying a house.  Of course I IMed my friends first thing when we found a great place, because I was excited and what is the purpose of having friends if you can’t share your excitement with them and share in their excitement?  He of course, was  completely jealous that we might be getting a house, started asking me all these questions like “how can you afford that?” and “isn’t your credit worse than ours?”.  When I explained that my credit was fine, my husbands was crap, and we got an FHA loan he just stopped talking to me.  No end to the conversation, nothing.  And then I find out he blocked me from following him on twitter.  Why? IDK, but that’s lame.  I don’t know what I did to piss him off to that point, but I’m really tired of having to tip toe around him.  And it sucks cuz E and I are such great friends, and our husbands used to be as well.  I just don’t know what happened, what changed, or what I did?  I want friends in my life that lift me up and support me.  I’m doing my best, I really don’t want this to affect my friendship with E.  I hope she knows I’ll always be there, even if her husband keeps up.

I guess in reality that’s it.  I feel a little better now with somethings off my chest.  I promise not to be gone so long this time, and my next post will be much more on topic

Cheers!